I’m hearing sentiments like “I really hope 2023 is a better year.”
From the outside, 2022 looked like a hard year for me. I started the year at my father-in-law’s funeral, and in the summer had a medical scare with my son.
And yet – looking back, I and consider it one of my best so far. My business is picking up. I had more “feel good” days than I can remember ever having. And I experienced more moments of presence with my kids than ever before.
What I’ve learned is that living a life that feels good has nothing to do with what happens to us. We can choose to feel good, even with hard things happening in our life.
How we feel is directly connected to the thoughts we are thinking. I am reading Supercoach by Michael Neill, and he uses a concept I like: the feelings in our body aren’t a reaction to the world outside. The feelings in our body are a reaction to the quality of our thinking. We experience the world through our thinking and perceptions, not necessarily on actual events.
Let’s play a quick game: I am going to give you two different perspectives on the same event – a child tantruming in a restaurant – see how each feels in your body.
👉🏻 Ugh. Would that kid just be quiet already? They are such a nuisance. Why isn’t their mother disciplining them? I knew never to act like that when I was their age.
👉🏻 Oh, poor little thing. They must be a little tired or hungry. I know exactly how their mama feels. I had a few times where I pushed my kids a little too far, and they’d act out from being so tired.
Did you notice a difference in how you felt? The situation didn’t change. Your thinking about the situation is what changed.
Let’s try an example with more juice.
👉🏼 The world is so hard. Everything I do is the wrong thing. I get beat down over and over, and bad things just keep happening.
👉🏼 I believe my natural state is to be happy. Hard things show up in my world to help me heal old energy that’s no longer serving me, and to grow into a higher version of me. I know pain is temporary, and on the other side of my pain is my freedom.
Which of those perspectives felt better?
Most of us kick off the new year with a goal – something we want to achieve. Yet it’s been shown time and again that nothing we change on the outside can help us feel better if we don’t look at our inner landscape, too.
To start 2023 with a more empowering perspective, I challenge you to do one of these things:
Stop looking for the things in each experience to complain about, and challenge yourself to look for the good things that happen.
Forgive yourself for something from your past. Understand that you made the best decision you could at the time, and continuing to play it out in your life only weighs you down.
Start a gratitude practice. Do this before bed / upon waking up, or set a phone alarm for a time of day. When your chosen time comes, identify five unique things you are grateful for and allow yourself to feel that gratitude flood your body.
If you are ready to make 2023 your year, stop waiting for something to change in the outer world. It cannot hand you a great life on a silver platter. Everything you perceive in your life starts within you. You have the power to change your world, despite everything else going on.
When you improve your world, you spread that love to others and give them permission to do the same. THAT’S how we change the world. It’s not by waiting for someone else to do it for you. It’s by becoming the change yourself.
And if you’re ready to make some changes, but could use a little guidance, book a virtual coffee with me. ☕ Let’s talk about the hard thing, and see if we’re a fit to journey together.
May 2023 be the year you start turning your life around, from the inside-out.
If you’re ready to take the first step in becoming the change you want to see in the world, grab my FREE PDF guide, 3 Ways to Tap Into the Authentic You, here. I also share content via email that I don’t share here on the blog. If you are interested in what I am sharing, grab the guide so you don’t miss out!
I (Andrea) am a Transformational and Spiritual Coach. I am passionate about women unlock their potential and create a fabulous life!
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